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A day for family

It was a bittersweet day. Today, Josh was buried. It was a wonderful funeral. He will be missed. The church was packed. Different people were invited to speak. I am not good at speaking in front a large group.

Josh was a really nice young man. He never met a stranger and always make me feel welcome. He was especially encouraging about my ED and my suicide attempt. He told that no matter how low or bad things were just remember how much JJ loves me and how he would feel without his mommy in his life. I took those words to heart. The world is a little bit dimmer without him in it.

My in-laws have their own family cemetery. This is where he was buried. At the end of the burial, four doves were released. One represented the Josh's spirit and the other three represented the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost. All four were suppose to fly off together. The one representing Josh perched itself on a branch and didn't fly away until the casket was lowered in the ground. I guess he just wasn't ready to say goodbye.

JJ has a good grasp of what has happened. He told that Josh was in an accident. He died and is now in heaven with God. "He's an angel and he watches over us," JJ said. The only part he doesn't get is the casket and the burial. He slept through the funeral on my lap.

All in all, things have went very well considering the circumstances. Things have went well with plenty of fellowship and a ton of food.

Daily Dose

1. KFC has the best chicken.

2. The weather heated up to about 40 degrees.

3. The forecast is calling for snow. Maybe JJ and I can have a snowball fight before I return to RR.


  1. Aw, that's so beautiful that he was encouraging about your ED and depression... What a beautiful soul. I hope you and your family are feeling ok... Loss is never easy.

  2. Keep strong and peace to you all SG.


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