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Showing posts from April, 2012

Bittersweet Beauty

Relay for Life is an event that is close to my heart. To see thousands come together for a common cause is beautiful. Cancer is very prevalent in my family so I do whatever I can. It  has taken on a special meeting since my mother's death. No matter what newspaper I am at, I always adopt Relay for Life as one of my things to cover. This weekend, I felt so blessed to be around so many amazing working together to defeat Cancer. I feel honored  when people trust me to tell their stories. This is why I became a reporter. Everyone has a story to tell. The survivor's walk is always hard for me. Deep down inside I wish my mother was one of them.  But I know she is in a better place now. It was a great way to spend a Friday night. Thursday was my therapy with Caroline. She is so awesome. I also met my new doctor for the first time. I continue on remeron but must go back on seroquel to help with the anxiety. For the past month, I  have done little things to tone up for the summer.

Sick and tired of being sick and tired!!

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Striking my best pose in my shirt dress and green pumps. I  had an moment this morning in the shower. I am tired of being unhappy and depressed.  So I decided I am doing something about it. I put on a black shirt dress (that looks awesome on me) and some cute green pumps. And I strutted my stuff today. For the first time in weeks, I didn't feel frumpy or down on how I looked. In fact, I thought I look damn good.  I am tired of being stressed about my job. I am tired of self-defeating thoughts about my appearance and weight gain. And I am tired of being tired. It ends today. Today, I took back  my life. From this moment on things will be done my terms. If the head honcho comes in May and decides my job is cut, I will shed some tears and pack up my things. But it will be because of budget and not because of job performance. I am a damn good reporter. I work hard to cover my huge beat.  There will be no more waddling in self pity on my couch. For the last few days, I hav

One step at a time...

Last week made my top five of worst weeks of my life.  I probably would have called in sick if another co-worker had not beat me to it. Anyway, I made a very bad mistake in Sunday's newspaper. I did a story on a 99-year-old woman. In the story, I mixed up two of her friends named Vivian. Needless to say, she is pissed at me. I feel really bad. I am very careful about things like this. I think it was a combination of being tired, stressed and having to write the story in a hurry. Either way, it's my fault and I feel really bad about it. The lady will turn 100 in a few days.  This story was suppose to put it the celebration scrapbook. Instead, I ruined it.  On top of it, the last few days have been rough EDwise. No matter what I wear, I feel like I am a huge cow. I  have been good about not restricting or letting ED win. this week, she won. I ate something for breakfast, skipped lunch each day and had dinner.  So I  have waddled in self-pity and various Criminal Minds marathon.