Is something wrong me?

-

I have applied for more than 200 jobs. I have had a few interviews that I thought were very promising. And here I sat unemployed. I found out yesterday that I didn't get the reporter's position that I really wanted. Of all the jobs that I have applied for, this is the one I wanted.

Today has not been a good day. I am up and dressed. I had some toast this morning but I don't really feel like eating or doing anything. I guess I need to regroup, refocus and figure out what I want to do with my life. Obviously, working full-time at a newspaper is not part of the plan. I did email the managing editor to find out why I wasn't chosen. It will give me something to work with.

I feel like I am trapped in the forest with no way out. But far up ahead, I can see some light. My day will come soon.

My next stop is the grocery store for my favorite comfort food when I am down and out--fish sticks and macaroni and cheese. This always cheers me up. Some fish sticks, some magazines and watching "Pretty in Pink" will make me feel better.

Daily Dose

1. Fish sticks and mac and cheese

2. Hugs from JJ

Comments

  1. KimJune 11, 2009 at 1:43 PM

    Sorry you're having a tough time. Job searching is exhausting, mentally and physically. I have to believe that the right thing will come your way when it's meant to come your way. You're being assertive. You're putting yourself out there. It's just a waiting game, when you have no real control. I know that feels TERRIBLE. The best you can do is take care of yourself so that when the opportunity does come along, you're healthy and ready to attack it!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Cacti Don't CryJune 11, 2009 at 4:52 PM

    I'm sorry you're having a hard day... there's nothing wrong with YOU. Finding a job is incredibly difficult, especially now. You can only do SO much, and it sounds like you're giving it everything you've got. It's hard, I know, but it will pay off for you in the long run.

    <3 <3

    ReplyDelete
  3. xxxJune 12, 2009 at 8:45 AM

    I hope the sun shine for you again soon.

    best wishes
    Ribbon

    ReplyDelete
  4. SarahJune 12, 2009 at 2:11 PM

    I feel what you're going through - I hit that wall a number of times not all that long ago. It's really damned near impossible to deal with a lack of callbacks and such when there's already an underlying sense of "am I good enough." The thing is - you are good enough; and when the perfect opportunity arises, you'll be ready and able to charge into it and thrive.

    ReplyDelete
  5. ellieJune 12, 2009 at 3:25 PM

    Job hunting is horrible in today's economy...sending good luck vibes your way!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Stopping a downward spiral

-
In the past, my birthday has always been a trigger for me to relapse or get anxious. But for the past two years, my birthday has been my birthday. A day to celebrate my birth.  Around Thanksgiving, I started feeling different. December was just a month of misery. I now realize that my meds had stopped working. So here I stand at a crossroad--I can increase the dosage and continue on my merry way or not. Remeron not only stabilizes my mood but gives me an appetite.  I haven't had one since Thanksgiving. I eat based on time. If it is 7:15 a.m., it is breakfast. By noon, I must eat lunch and dinner between 6 and 7 p.m. If I increased the dosage, the appetite comes back for awhile  but I will gain more weight. This is why I was taking Seroquel to help with anxiety.  I don't think there is a enough Seroquel in the world to deal with my anxiety. And while my therapist is being helpful, he admitted this is beyond him. So we are looking for a therapist outside of the area...
Read more

Disturbance in the world of Jack

-
Let me start by saying that I am okay. And considering the way crime is in RR, it could have been a lot worst. I keep odd hours. I can leave for work at 7:30 a.m. and sometimes I don't come home until 8 or 9 p.m.  Last Friday night, I actually got done early at 5 p.m. and went to the grocery store. While at the store, I debated canned peas or frozen peas (very important later). I ended up with canned ones because the frozen brand I like was not at Food Lion. I drive home in a fairly decent mood because I will be home before 6:30 p.m. and can watch the news. I live on a street with lots of duplexes and kids. The road running parallel to my street is very busy, no sidewalks and no street lights. People walking tend to walk in people's yards so they don't get hit by a car. Plus, pedestrians and bikers in RR, don't wear light colored clothes at night. This puts them at serious risk for injury. This is a personal pet peeve of mine.  I pull into my driveway, park in front...
Read more

RR is alive with the sounds of music

-
Music is key in my life. I don’t know what I would do without it. As a teenager, I loved to make mixtapes for friends and families. And now, I love making mix cds to listen to on long road trips home or when I am out covering NH county. I guess along with pens, magazines and libraries, music is my thing. Most of the time, when I am writing, I like to listen to music. My favorite thing is to turn on Itunes radio and just listen to various songs. It is how I discover musicians like Evans Blue or Sia. It is one thing that remained throughout my struggles with my ED. I never loss my love of music. Sometimes it was the only thing that could calm my mind when it was consumed by thoughts of ED. Words make you think a thought. Music makes you feel a feeling. A song makes you feel a thought. --E. Y. Harburg Some of my favorite memories are tied to songs. I can remember my feelings being at that Dave Matthew concert. I can remember how I felt seeing my mom dance to Earth, Wind and Fire and Chic...
Read more