Wednesday, May 27, 2009

It's been awhile

This is going to be a long post since I haven’t updated in awhile.

Yesterday, JJ had an appointment with the original neurologist. It went okay. The next few days will be busy with freelance stuff. The editor is taking next week off for his anniversary. He asked me if I would be interested in covering the a town council meeting and a county commissioner meeting. Can we say YES!!! I love government meetings. I always watch the latest Mecklenburg County Commissioners meeting when it comes on late at night. I know I’m a geek but I love those meetings.

On Memorial Day, we took JJ to his second movie. Another 50 cent special. The choices that were JJ acceptable were Hotel for Dogs, Escape from Witch Mountain or Paul Blatt—Mall Cop. We saw the Mall Cop. I couldn’t sit through the other two. JJ loved it. And of course, we went to McDonalds for food and the Playland. My mood has improved. I just have to stay strong and know things will look up. The oven part of our stove went out a few weeks ago. We’re getting another one. It’s not new but it will do the job. I can’t wait. One of my goals is to cook a good meal each week. And by good I mean I have tons of recipes that I have always wanted to try but was afraid because of my ED. I’m working on a family cookbook.

The car situation is still at stalemate. So I used the long weekend as a break from being the stay-at-home mom. My hubby was responsible for JJ while I read, wrote and watched dvds. I read this new novel by Gillian Flynn called Dark Places. This book was awesome. She has a fan for life in me. I have been in a mood lately. I guess I am just discouraged by the job hunt. I thought by now I would have a job and insurance. I guess I am hoping that if I get a job then it will make all the sadness go away. I know there is no magic potion that will make years of my ED and depression just go away. But something has got to give. Some days I feel like I am being punished. There are still some positives such as I am not restricting like I would normally when I am in a mood like this.

To cheer myself up, I worked on my lifelong to do list. I have accomplished some stuff but have much more to do. I guess I need to get busy. I have posted it so I will have motivation.


  1. You love government meetings? haha. That is definitely a unique quality :) I'm sure it helps when you're doing writing assignments. I try to watch CSPAN sometimes, but I get very bored. I admire your enthusiasm :) More people really should be interested in government, but it's easy to ignore it.

    I love the family cookbook idea. I have about 15 "regular" recipes and I think about putting them in a fun cookbook, just for me mostly. Right now, they are on post-its in a drawer.

    Just so you know, anyone (regardless of ED or depression or anything else) would be tense about a pending job. Of course you're frustrated! You want an answer. You want to move forward. It's understandable. Don't be too hard on yourself. I know I have a tendency to equate every bad mood with my "history" and sometimes, it's just a bad mood. You're human, after all :) LIke you said, at least you're not restricting. The tough times are when recovery really shows. When everything is great, it's not so hard to eat well. For me, when there is a negative event, or anxiety waiting for something, or whatever, I am more likely to fall back into patterns. If you're fighting that, that is an accomplishment.

    I'm curious about what's on your life list! You should post it here!

  2. Thanks for the encourgement Kim! Government meetings fascinate me. I am working on getting the list up!


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