Skip to main content

A lazy Sunday afternoon except it's Saturday

When it Rome, do what the Romans do. Today has been a lazy tv watching and magazine reading day. I wanted my last day here at the hospital with my mom to be peaceful. It was! We ate our meals together. Watched disaster movies on the Sci Fi channel. And now we are watching Bridezillas. My mom agrees there is something about watching a train wreck unfold in front of you. It was nice.

For dinner, she had chicken pan pie. I had a nice salad. And for dessert, we had little cups of ice cream that nurse brought us. My mom is a take-no-prisoners type person. Growing up, declarations of love and hugs were given. It was understood that she loved me. It wasn't until I was 22 and in the psych ward for an almost suicide attempt (combination of depression and ED) that she admitted she loved me. I was a grandma's girl so I figured my mother and I were just a lost cause. This is the reason I have lived up to 5 hours away. We have always did well in separate locations. When my grandmother died in 1998, I pretty much figured her funeral would be the last time I would talk to my mother. But my mother wasn't having it. I have to admit she fought hard to stay in my life. It started with a 10-minute call once every two weeks. A 30-minute once a month in person visit. It wasn't easy to get where we are now. But I am glad we both worked hard at it.

I have lived in this hospital on and off for a month. My wallet took a hit but I don't regret it. I got to spend time with my mother while she is still lucid and feisty as ever. I will miss her and the dessert area in the cafeteria. I worry about her and the future. And she worries about me--
MOM--I am going to miss you. You have spoiled me.
ME--You deserve it.
MOM--I worry that you don't eat enough. I know it is hard. Promise me, you'll try harder and see your therapist person.
MOM--I would hate to have to get well. And then I have to kick your ass.
ME--Point gotten.

My mom rocks. She is starting to have trouble holding cups and utensils with her good hand. She said it is a side effect from the chemo. I think it is because of the tumor in her upper arm that I discovered while putting lotion on her arm. It may not be a tumor but it is significant mass of something. It feels good to say this out loud. I haven't told the three musketeers but plan to talk to the doctor in the a.m.

Tomorrow, I head for home. The new boss has laid down some new rules. So I go from one stress to another one. But I'm not worried. What will be will be.

Daily Dose

1. A shout out to the dessert area in the cafeteria of the hospital. Some of the best desserts I have ever tasted.

2. A big thanks to the nurses, techs and others who have been so kind to my mom.

3. Bridezillas is quite interesting!!!!


  1. I am glad you have some good things to take away and it's good your mum is thinking of you as well. I hope you are okay and I hope you have a safe trip back home.

  2. That's great how you and your mom worked on and improved your relationship over the years.

  3. It's so great you have developed that connection. My mother died when I was a girl and it always hurts when people let their maternal relationships die, when the mother herself has not.

    I hope things go well with your mother's health, and your on : ]

  4. I am glad that you and your mom have gotten close again. It is tough to create a bond after so much distance. Hope everything gets better!


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Spending time with my son

Memorial Day is always special for me as a reporter and a person. It is a chance to recognize who gave their life so I and others can have the freedom we have. 
Normally, I work and get to take Memorial Day holiday on another day. This year, I got a double bonus. 

I got to spend the long weekend with my son. Things some how worked that my son’s aunt met me halfway and JJ was able to spend three days in Pickle Land with me. He had a chance to see me working and spend quality time together.

JJ is now 11. He is squarely in the pre-teen world. His voice is changing along with other things. My baby is growing up and it scares me. He got to see my new teeth and loved them. He said it was nice to see me so happy. 
We had a chance to talk and just spend some time together. And in two weeks, he returns for a two week involving my week long vacation and a bunch of day camps. It has been a good few days.
The other part is my Memorial Day weekend is this weekend. I'm going to the Lake to hang with…

My new smile

I have great news. Last Monday (April 10), I got my new teeth. 

They have definitely been a game changer. It is weird being able to smile at people. There have been some adjustments with talking and eating. I am so thankfully and blessed that I was able to afford to this. 

1. I got my new teeth!!!!
2. So thankful to my dentist Dr. Wynne and Faison Dental.
3. I can smile after not smiling for almost 20 years!

My home library is complete!!!!!

I write a book column for Duplin Times in Kenansville, N.C. called the Book Nerd. This is my May column, which is about me finally completing my home library.

“When all else fails give up and go to the library.”
-Stephen King

I have always loved this quote, because I have done as he advises hundreds of times.
After having a very bad day, I would head to my nearest library for some calming support.
But now, all I have to do is go home, and go into my own personal library.

Ever since I was a young girl, I have dreamed of having my own library. I learned to read at an early age and always had a book with me. Growing up, I always had a small shelf with books on it in my room. In college, I started to collect books. As I got older and moved to various places, there were always bookshelves.
When I moved into my current home on May 21, 2016, there were three-bedrooms with a pantry and two living rooms. Yes, two living rooms.
I decided before moving that the original living room with its mantle wo…